With your qualifications and perhaps the
help of a friend, you have secured your
opportunity to sell yourself. Your ability
to connect with the interviewer can cinch
the job. Making a good impression on your
interviewer requires more than dressing
sharply, polishing your shoes and being
polite. From the moment you come in sight of
the interviewer, you begin the elusive
process of connecting.
Studies show that people tend to remember
events better when they are linked with an
emotional impression. Whether the feelings
associated with an event are positive or
negative, emotional connections make the
event salient, helping us remember things
more clearly. Making a memorable impression
on the interviewer depends on your ability
to connect with the interviewer.
It helps if your personalities click and you
both love to rock climb, or if you discover
you both share the same alma mater and
deeply admire Alan Greenspan. It helps if
you have something in common. With some
practice, you need not rely on external or
circumstantial points of mutual reference in
order to establish a good rapport with the
interviewer. At a minimum, you can expect
that the interviewer wants you to understand
and appreciate what she is saying-her goals
and concerns, position, expectations and
needs.
You can generate good vibes and emotions
when you actively listen to the interviewer.
This does not mean that you need to ask her
about her childhood or her greatest fears.
Your interviewer does not need you as a
confidant. She just needs to feel like you
are an attentive and engaged interviewee.
So, when you find yourself facing your
interviewer across a table (after you have
made certain no stray particles blemish your
otherwise radiant smile), you can be certain
she wants to be listened to and respected.
The active listening skills you can employ
to connect with your interviewer are not
unique, but are seldom used. (Think of the
last time someone gave you his undivided,
empathetic attention for an hour!) In some
ways these skills are an art - but don't
worry, you can develop the ability with some
practice.
Use empathetic body language.
Both your words and your behavior will
affect whether you establish a connection
with the interviewer. When you meet the
potential employer or human resources
officer, you will want to show that you are
confident, trusting, open, attentive, and
eager, but restrained.
All of this can be communicated in a
handshake. Make sure that your hand is about
perpendicular to the floor. If you extend
your hand with your palm facing down, you
indicate that you need to be in
control-something that can be off-putting in
an interview scenario. If you extend your
hand with your palm facing up, you can
appear overly docile. Try extending your
hand with your palm relatively flat, so that
you offer to make full contact with the
other person's hand. If you cup your hand,
you indicate that you mistrust the other
person.
Likewise, your posture throughout the
interview indicates whether you are open and
attentive, or somehow withdrawn from the
interviewer. Leaning back shows boredom or
sometimes insolence. It is better to sit up
straight and lean forward just slightly,
facing the interviewer directly. Crossing
your arms in front of you may indicate that
you are somehow defensive, whether from
insecurity or mistrust. Try to keep your
arms open, even if your legs are crossed.
Eye contact is crucial. Look the person in
the eye when you are speaking and listening.
To avoid giving the interviewer the
impression that you are boring through him
with your transfixed gaze, take breaks and
look away to the right or left.
Mirror the interviewer.
People feel comfortable when you do the same
things that they do, provided your
imitations are not obvious. If the
interviewer is smiling, smile. If the
interviewer furrows her brow at a certain
point, do the same. But if the interviewer
smokes, don't light up. Mirroring works not
only for behaviors, but also verbal
statements. If you briefly say what you hear
when someone else says it, you show that you
are connected. Again, this engaged listening
tool should be used with discretion. Too
much can be awkward.
Example: The interviewer says:
Our company has doubled in personnel and
tripled in revenue over the last five
years. The interviewee: Tripled in
revenue. The interviewer: In order to
meet the constraints of the current
economy, we are refocusing our business
practices. We have had to reduce the
workforce in some departments without
reducing our client load. While this
means that we expect our employees to
work more efficiently, we also intend to
equip them for this efficiency by
providing more thorough training and
clearer direction. The interviewee:
Employee efficiency is important.
Ask well-placed, clarifying
questions.
If you do not fully understand something
that the interviewer asks or says, it is
best to clarify. Doing so signals to the
interviewer that you are invested in what he
or she is saying. These questions can be
tricky, however. If you ask questions that
seek clarification on issues that are
tangential to the thrust of the
interviewer's communication, they derail the
person's train of thought and cause people
to become defensive or withdrawn. The
interviewer will be convinced that you are
not paying attention if you seek information
that has just been given to you. Before
interrupting the interviewer to clarify a
point, make sure that you are listening
attentively. Follow the train of thought of
the speaker. Then pose a question.
Example: I'm sorry, I don't
think that I fully understand the
reporting structure for this position.
Would I have one or two supervisors?
Ask open-ended questions.
Open-ended questions allow the interviewer
to respond as he or she desires and also
demonstrate that you are open to what the
interviewer says. The responses might
challenge your assumptions, so they mitigate
miscommunication. They also allow you subtly
to steer the interview in a way that allows
you to learn the things you wish about the
company and job. The information you gather
from these questions will assist you in
evaluating the company.
Example: What are the greatest
challenges that the person filling this
position will likely encounter?
